Envy will get you nowhere in life. Many people ask me: Is your gorgiosity natural, or is it fake? I tell them the truth. It’s fake. My face takes work. I’ve got a face like the road less taken. It’s always got a hole in it somewhere. Every morning when I get up I’ve got to lay down the asphalt. I plaster on the foundation, the powder, the blusher, the concealer, the eye shadow, the eyeliner, the mascara, the eyebrow pencil, the lip pencil, the lipliner, the lipstick, the lip gloss. … [Read more...]
Arse to 5 K: Prelude to a Miss.
A small flotilla of ducks regard me serenely from the lake as I begin a vigorous set of calisthenics to warm up. There are three of them, and all are still watching ten seconds later as I sit on a bench to pant and rest. One of them, whom I have dubbed Little Waddler, swims ashore to plop next to me, in expectations of Bickies. No, I say. No Bickies today. Today we are turning over a new leaf. Nay, not merely a leaf, … [Read more...]