I’ve noticed this thing that’s been happening to me a lot of late. I’ve only gradually become aware of what a phenomenon it is, a gift I never appreciated until now. It happened to me again this morning. I woke up alive. I’ve been waking up alive my entire life, of course, but never woke to what a miracle it is until recently. I don’t know why the entire world isn’t in a mad fever of celebration every single day, when we all wake up … [Read more...]
Vain and Undiluted!
Envy will get you nowhere in life. Many people ask me: Is your gorgiosity natural, or is it fake? I tell them the truth. It’s fake. My face takes work. I’ve got a face like the road less taken. It’s always got a hole in it somewhere. Every morning when I get up I’ve got to lay down the asphalt. I plaster on the foundation, the powder, the blusher, the concealer, the eye shadow, the eyeliner, the mascara, the eyebrow pencil, the lip pencil, the lipliner, the lipstick, the lip gloss. … [Read more...]
Boarding House Reach!
"No two strangers ever sat down at my table that didn’t stand up as friends. The rules of the house are posted on the inside of your room door. I do not permit any food or drink in the rooms, and that includes alcohol. There is absolutely no sleepwalking permitted on my premises and excessive snoring will not be tolerated. The streetcar runs from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. and I lock my front door at 10.15. Not 10.14. Not 10.16. Precisely at 10.15. Never argue with a Brazil Square landlady. My … [Read more...]
Killing Time in Airports: Zen and the Lost Gates
In a Sufi fable, the lost Gates of airports live on in a murmuration of winged creatures, interfering with planes and occasionally manifesting as dense fog to obstruct flights. It is very stressful to be checking through security holding a boarding pass with no Gate indicated on it. This stress is only surpassed when you disembark from one flight knowing you have mere minutes to make your connecting flight, and your boarding pass still has no Gate indicated on it. Killing … [Read more...]